I just keep reading you post and not knowing what to do. i have set goals such as gym, cleaning house, kids back in school/daycare. These have all been accomplished. i guess time to continue the gym and set some more for me.
To your points.
1) This one is tough or me. I guess that she is in this A, and nothing is going to change until she wants to. She is lost in the fog and there is nothing I can do about it.
2) i guess I have been focusing more on what I can do to change my sitch, and that is not going to help. I need to do things for me. Tough to do the real things I want because I have the kids pretty much all the time when I am not @ work.
3) Thinking about getting my mountain bike fixed up and incorporating that into my exercise regiment.
4) Tough one here. discussed with L's and they all pretty much said don't change anything and just let her continue to dig her hole. Not sure if this is the best advice for my M or my D. I really struggle with boundaries and don't want to file due to religious beliefs. I honestly feel that D is inevitable and that if I piss her off then that will effect the outcome of D. Once she files though "the gloves will come off". I was advised to be like a duck on water. Calm on the surface but treading like crazy underneath.
5) I am making changes with getting some new clothes and more socially active. It is hard with being a full time Dad and i think that she has recently started not having them spend the night with her because she doesn't want me to go out and do things based on her comments. Of course her reason for this is she needs money and her family won't let them until I pay them. Basically she wants me to pay rent to them. Not going to happen.
I am really struggling with what boundaries i need to put in place as most really seem like punishment or vindictive when i think about them.
Goals I know that I need them, but I just feel like they are trivial. I think I am going to focus on projects around my house and break them down.
I just feel dead in the water @ this point. Like I am heading for a brick all and I can't do anything to stop it.
