This isn't all your fault. Your W CLEARLY has some issues. She reminds me of my W. Lots and lots of drama.
You sound like a rescuer, Tim. You were the knight in shining armor protecting her and the boys.
Man, we are so alike.
Here's the thing, men like us typically attract women that need rescuing. It helps define us and gives us purpose.
Did you make mistakes? Absolutely. We all have. But your W wasn't an innocent angel in this either. And she clearly wasn't communicating effectively (ie the dogs are the reason you aren't having sex - gimme a break).