KG, I'm sorry. I am also a ruminator and an obsessor, and letting things just be for me, is really difficult. I have not slept much in the past week due to this.
My manfriend and I aren't completely done, but our R is ending in a similar way and I am learning it's not me and it's ok to have my own needs. My guy is in a place where he wants his cake and eat it too, and that's his deal, not mine. We really aren't on the same page right now. And I am learning that's ok. It is possible for two people to be in two different places in their lives. Those places might not be compatible with needs and boundaries.
I also met much of manfriend's family. Hi D and I got close, I met his ex (baby momma) a few times, I met most of his friends, and we spoke of a future together. However, it takes work, and both have to be willing to put it in.
I keep myself in check with my IC to guide me through life and the dating process. I do need some reassurance and some unbiased opinions on how I am handling myself, if I am repeating patterns, and what can be done to recognize it and change it.
Keep on going. Meet with the IC. You'll get a good perspective. And work on learning and letting go. I too still am working on that. It's a tough one, but it brings peace in the end.
