It just shatters you to a million pieces when your kids are hurting. It has been the hardest part of this process - to be at my best as a parent when I am at my absolute worst. Keep it up, Red. You are doing great. In only a few days, you have come so far to take care of yourself and them. You are very strong and you should be very proud of yourself. Keep it up!
M 44 H 46 M 20yrs T 25 yrs S15 S12
ILYBINILWY 7/18/15 Move to MBR 9/8/15 Physical Separation 10/10/15 Suspect A 8/2015 Confirm A 12/27/15 D filed by H 2/2/16
Sorry to hear about your children and their sadness, Red. The kids are the saddest part of all our sitches. It seems so unfair that our WASs can't pull their heads out of their butts. However, the fact that it destroys the kids is the worst of it. Before the separation I had thought about leaving a bit myself, and then thought no, I have kids (even if I am not the biological father) I don't have the pleasure of leaving when it gets a bit hard.
I guess that is the difference between being a committed spouse and a WS.
It is good to hear that you went out. I hope the guys hitting on you and flirting with you, helped your confidence and showed you that you are the type of woman a man wants.
Me 41 W 33 M 2013 Suspect A 11/15 Confirm A 1/16 She moved out 2/14/16 Stepson 13 Stepson 16
Today I told him we have to try to work together for the kids and come up with a better visitation agreement. He kept them overnight 5 out of 14 days off.
He was annoyed but also didnt realize how little he saw them.
Hopefully he will try seeing them more. If not oh well i guess
Today I told him we have to try to work together for the kids and come up with a better visitation agreement. He kept them overnight 5 out of 14 days off.
He was annoyed but also didnt realize how little he saw them.
Hopefully he will try seeing them more. If not oh well i guess
Got into a phone argument with wah. I know ot was my fault since I got annoyed, he got an attitude, then I cried.. Yeah not good.
I had him say this is why he left because I'm difficult.
Our fight was over the kids schedule. He said he would watch them saturday,Sunday and Wednesday. I thought that meant next Wednesday.now he meant this Wednesday in 2 days.
I was confused since he kept saying saturday,Sunday, Wednesday. He called me an idiot. I got emotional and told him to stop making me feel like an idiot.
He wouldn't keep them Thursday since he had to go to OW town. I Got pissy..he got annoyed.
He told me to have the kids call him at work. I said Idk we will see. He called me difficult, I said I didn't think calling at work for the kids to talk was the best idea.
It was just bad 20 minutes of him mad and me crying( Just a little but he can tell) the last 10 while we argued.
I feel like a failure.
We already argued this morning too at 10 am over me not answering his calls when I was too busy.
I'm ready for bed. Apparently I sucked at NC today. 2 calls and 2 arguments.
Now what..idfk. I feel like a lost duck. I am drowning in my own pityparty since finding out about my h and the ow.
This thread name really describes me right now. I do not know what to do with myself today.
Yes my situation reminds me A LOT of mustardseeds. All the stuff she says, is how I feel but more beautifully written.
I did a cleansing of my room today. Bleached my bed and walls, deep cleaned, all new sheets and bed set. Make it look gorgeous.
Im waiting until Monday to set up the room. I want to have it done after he spends the weekend there with me gone. I want to enjoy it a few days without him.
He had an attitude today, I just let it go and remained happy. Thats my new goal. NO MATTER HOW MEAN he is, remain happy.
