I also understand. But Thorton hit it on the head. If this was a recipe to make things work. There almost surely would be hundreds of these sites and prob minimal divorces.
The feeling you said about hope being your only and thing and without it you have nothing. We have all been there. Or still there
The problem is that is highly visible to others even though you try to fake it. Very little quick reach out or asking about R. It makes things clear. That is what I take from this site. It is to get those feelings of having nothing replaced with what you really have. A life. Yourself and a future.
You can write your future however you want. But focusing all our thoughts on one other person and typically these thoughts turn out negative because we are just thinking about what we want from them and how bad it is now that those are the prevalent thoughts we send out to the world.
I struggle with this also. I am living my life and fairly happy with what I am doing. But she is on my mind all day everyday still. I need to turn the thoughts I have about her from a wanting to positive future thoughts. If she is going to occupy space in my brain still then it needs to be awesome. I really fight off the pity I think about when I look back and think about the situation. But. If it ends up being over forever I know I will somehow move on. I don't the answer how yet but I know I will.
I was blessed with a lot in life. I remember back before we were together and she was all I wanted. She was eventually delivered. I pictures how happy her and I would be together before there was even a chance. Then she appeared.
That is the difference in my thoughts now
I need to get back there.
But as time goes I am happy with myself and enjoying my time.
This site if we follow it will help us get ourselves back and that may bring the spouse back.
M 37 W 34
T 12 M 8 D 7 S 4
Need break 4/12/15 W no ring 7/7/15
Separate room 4/12/15 Separate living suggested 8/15 W moved out 11/1/15
