Letting go, finally

[Sotto]

Hi JGuy, I would agree with RD. I read all the tentative stuff with OW and exploring the 'friendship' with integrity - and thought - nope, that sounds like a disaster to me. Don't kid yourself on that one my friend and forgive any bluntness.

I subscribe to the Zues philosophy of - try your hardest to save your M. If that isn't possible, wait at least a year after D, use that time to work on you, and then start to think about dating.

Your approach - however you may dress all of that up - isn't healthy IMHO. The mere fact of having an OP in the picture that you have feelings for just isn't going to fly. And it doesn't matter if your W is 'supportive' - this isn't about her, it's about you. For me, I have a very clear view - I don't want to be married AND dating.

So, my advice would be to cut this OP out of the picture. Have a look at recent posts on Mutatio's thread. Let her know that you feel vulnerable at the moment and her attention has been welcomed by you - but you are not in a position to have contact with her just now.

JMHO of course - and please forgive any bluntness....I do mean the advice kindly and only hope for the best for you. Xx