WW, My Addiction, Patience, and Hope - III

[JGuy]

That's really awful, trumpet. I'm sorry that it has sunk this low. Something about you snooping must really trigger your W in a bad way for her to lose it like that. In my sitch, I gave up snooping back at the end of December, and I'm glad I did. I have no way to know for sure that my W is being honest other than gut feelings, but I prefer this over what it was turning me into to be snooping on her. Not being able to know if she was contacting the OM really forced me to let go and start to detach.

If there's one thing that you and your W might be able to get aligned on at this point, it's putting the kids first. Perhaps if you speak to your W from a place of vulnerability and genuine concern for the kids, you can find a way to meet in the middle and agree not to escalate the drama any further. It sounds like her madness is getting the better of her and the slightest mistake on your part gets blown out of proportion. I think the best way to make sure you don't add more fuel to the fire is to detach, like Zues says.