Staying the Course Pt. II

[HopeRB]

Yes, thats good Thornton. I'm going to post those words somewhere I will see them every, single day.That and to "act as if." I think if I can just do those things, I'll be in a good place but please let me know if you guys have any other ideas, tips or tricks for staying focused in the moment because this is where I get off course.

[broke]

Hope - stay strong. I agree with Thornton, validate. Don't be defensive and push your H. Be light and breezy, talk about the taxes and try to be the one that ends the interaction first. Look like a knockout. Maybe have plans for after you see him (show him your GALing). Good luck - I'll be thinking of you! Keep us posted.

[Vanilla]

TimR, I agree, we need a good reference guide b/c those texts are a doozy. Vanilla, please help us out!

When I can, Wonka is the queen on this.

V

[HopeRB]

Went to the gym earlier today. Trying to re-evaluate and redefine my goals b/c I'm feeling like I'm just kind of floating about through life right now.

H has not reached out. I probably shouldn't follow up right? But I now I worry about going dark for no reason, which is whats been going on. I have backed off from initiating contact with him but not sure what this is accomplishing at this point. So really just kind of confused on what I'm supposed to be doing. I tried to schedule a call with DB coach but she's booked until next week.

[Thornton]

Yep, don't contact him. You are giving him space to miss you. Keep working on you and working hard in the gym.

You already are doing the right thing, Hope. Working on yourself and respecting H's desire to be away right now.

You're doing good.

[HopeRB]

Frustrating that this is they way its been going. This is our interaction. Thornton, do you know of anyone around here who has had little to no contact with their WAS but the situation turned around? I'm just like, what the heck?!

[Thornton]

Mine did. 18 months ago.

She left and I went pitch black nc. She texted after one month about picking up her stuff. Then texted 2 weeks later. Then texted again about a week later. We ended up getting back together.

Now I'm here again and doing nc again. It's been about a month now. Her D8 texted me from her phone a few weeks ago so that caught me off guard but haven't heard from her.

It's awful no knowing what is happening. I don't know if I'll ever talk to her again and that hurts me.

[HopeRB]

Pushed submit before I was finished with my thoughts:

It's weird b/c though I feel stronger, I also feel discouraged. Like how can anything change if we're not even communicating? He just has no desire to contact me at all. Guess I should just stop hoping b/c I literally have nothing to go off of. I think he's forgotten about me. A few weeks ago, his friend told me that he seems fine but says at the back of his mind, he thinks about me. How can I go from spending so much time with someone to being only at the back of their mind? Just feeling so insignificant even though I know I'm important. This kind of thing makes me just feel like giving up hope b/c his actions say he could care less.

[Thornton]

I know EXACTLY how you feel.

[HopeRB]

Thanks Thornton. I've been so patient, loving him from a distance, giving him his space. I don't call him, email him, ask him stuff, nothing. And it means nothing to him. Guess he's a lot happier now.