DbD- please slow down. I know you're hurting and it feels like you keep getting hit with punch after punch. You are free to decide if you want to try for a future together, but don't make that decision out of emotion. Take some time and clear your head. You don't have to talk tonight and can excuse yourself from any conversations.
M34 W35 S5 S2 T10 M6 on/off over the years including her A Recently- Nov 2015 bomb Nov 2015-Feb 2016 Reconciling Feb bomb March-April Reconciling May - bomb Mid-May I tell her I'm done
Thanks guys. Not sure . I dont know if I want someone that i dont trust. I will have to get her thoughts on it right or wrong. I love her but I am no doormat. It seems so punitive on her part. What else says "I'm back on the market more than that?" This is my second time doing this and I am kind of worn down. I'm sure that is her end game. just got back from coaching S basketball practice. Have cooled a bit. Will try to think more on it.
Fight the good fight no matter the quality of your opponent.
Me-50 WAW-45 S13 Married 24 years Bomb 1-Jan.2008 Disc. EA She came back for 8 years Bomb 2-Jan-2016 Separation 3-12-2016
No need to address it tonight. The issue will still be there tomorrow. Sleep on it. I agree with others....wait until your less emotional. I wish I never would've taken my wedding ring off.
M 44 H 46 M 20yrs T 25 yrs S15 S12
ILYBINILWY 7/18/15 Move to MBR 9/8/15 Physical Separation 10/10/15 Suspect A 8/2015 Confirm A 12/27/15 D filed by H 2/2/16
Thanks for talking me off the ledge guys. Feeling better as we did talk. Really nothing will change between us until she moves out. Then we can each breathe a bit. She at least come around to say she is not sure how she will feel given some time as opposed to "i think we are just prolonging the inevitable" . Did the gym today and have become a regular. Wow! me a regular at the gym? Go figure.
Fight the good fight no matter the quality of your opponent.
Me-50 WAW-45 S13 Married 24 years Bomb 1-Jan.2008 Disc. EA She came back for 8 years Bomb 2-Jan-2016 Separation 3-12-2016
M34 W35 S5 S2 T10 M6 on/off over the years including her A Recently- Nov 2015 bomb Nov 2015-Feb 2016 Reconciling Feb bomb March-April Reconciling May - bomb Mid-May I tell her I'm done
Home from a trip with S. Had fun. Was brought back to reality when out doing some yard work. Decayed fencing, all kinds of repairs needed. Just compounds the sadness. Just like the decayed M. Plus went and got a terrible haircut. Can anything else go wrong? Wait. yes it could.
Fight the good fight no matter the quality of your opponent.
Me-50 WAW-45 S13 Married 24 years Bomb 1-Jan.2008 Disc. EA She came back for 8 years Bomb 2-Jan-2016 Separation 3-12-2016
I decided to stay home from work today to make some Dr. appts and buy some new bathroom towels that I like not her. W asks me this morning if I am going to work. I said, "no i have some things to do today". Kinda vague. I get a text from her at around noon asking me "what kinda things did you have to do today?" I waited around 15 minutes to respond and texted back "some appts. and phone calls to make and some errands".
Was that a good response back? Why would she care? Lawyer fear maybe? Thoughts?
Fight the good fight no matter the quality of your opponent.
Me-50 WAW-45 S13 Married 24 years Bomb 1-Jan.2008 Disc. EA She came back for 8 years Bomb 2-Jan-2016 Separation 3-12-2016
I think your responses seemed fine. I could be wrong...still in the 'learning to walk' phase of DBing....but you were not rude, or dismissive. You simply didn't provide any details. It probably drove her nuts....which I'm sure you're cool with. lol
I got super frustrated yesterday afternoon...and thought of you...how we were all screaming to 'not react', or 'pump the breaks'. It's SO much harder to do when your emotions are amped.
Keep up the good work...stay the course!
Ojap M 13 T 15 D 11 D 11 D 9 BD #1: ILYBNILWY 09/2015 BD #2: W asks for S 12/2015 ---------- Currently: Limbo
Thanks Pajo. I found out she thought I was meeting with a lawyer. She has been nice and noticed some changes in me but just it feels like one of those "feel sorry for me, pat the little doggy on the head" kind of nices. Kind of insulting but at least noticing.
Fight the good fight no matter the quality of your opponent.
Me-50 WAW-45 S13 Married 24 years Bomb 1-Jan.2008 Disc. EA She came back for 8 years Bomb 2-Jan-2016 Separation 3-12-2016
Is it bad to have some joy knowing that she was 'worried or stressed about where YOU were'?!
I have don't that SO much w/ my W, that I sometimes wish she could feel that tension. I know that's not a worthy goal...and doesn't really serve any purpose or outcome. But man...it an really stink sometimes.
Ojap M 13 T 15 D 11 D 11 D 9 BD #1: ILYBNILWY 09/2015 BD #2: W asks for S 12/2015 ---------- Currently: Limbo
