Wow, mind is blown 13

[Uphill]

I think I have to pull back on the reins hard. I thought I was doing the right thing by being there and listening at this point. It's hard not to be the shoulder to lean on for a person you know and care for... Uggghh

[Sotto]

Hi U, it sounds like it's time to gently withdraw and do your own thing again. On her part, it may have been more of a temp check, and once you have shown some interest, she has backed away a little.

But, I think it's a baby step as there are clearly some feelings still there on her part. Don't be unpleasant, just remove all pressure (ie: R talk) and go about your own life for now.

Take care xx

[Uphill]

Sotto, my game plan exactly. Just live my life like I was and see what happens. She came to me for all the talks that happened but I was more than likely too available.

Side note, in this past week, she did quit her job. I made it very clear that would have to happen in the past when we talked. Also, her Facebook has been cleared of anybody associated with that job or OM. I guess that may have been what got my hopes up so quickly? What she was saying, was being backed by action all week. Then it's like a partial wall came up as if second guessing. Maybe it was just a bad day? The finality of them having no further contact at all?

Time will tell, kid swap in a few hours. Wish me luck!

[broke]

Uphill - I would've felt encouraged by all of that, too. I thunk you've got a great game plan now though. Good luck on the kid swap. Stay strong!

[Uphill]

Same story at kid swap. Distant and seemed cranky. Just left it be and sent her on her way

[Sotto]

I guess she's dealing with a lot of stuff Uphill. Affair processing? What am I going to do for work now? Clearing online debris?

Best to maintain a very steady course yourself for now. Keep expectations low and be willing to talk a little if she wants to. Otherwise, it may be best just to be pleasant and briefing when you see her. Give her a little space and time for now...

I do think there have been some 'actions' though, which is positive :)X

[Uphill]

Yeah, the actions (I see now) got my expectations up. The work thing is already dealt with. Not a job she wants, but will pay bills until something else comes along. That was topic of convo a few times this week along with everything else.

I personally feel as if it is manly OM stuff on her mind? But that is merely mind reading. I do get it, but it was the classic affair DOWN... Big time! Still emotions to process though

[Thornton]

I've heard that before. That usually the OM or ow is a downgrade.

[Uphill]

Thorn, very much so in this case. Classic pond scum, dead end job and no future on his path. Any time I ever saw a pic of the guy he honestly looks like a homeless bum... Ruined his own marriage a few years back doing the same kind of thing. Uses his little bit of seniority at work to basically victimize the girls there.

[Uphill]

Not gonna lie, struggling a bit today. All the thoughts of why she may be acting like she is. I know they aren't worth the headspace but I can not shake them today.