Beginning of the End

[TimR]

Thank you everyone. I have been going dark with her but maybe should hit the dimmer switch. Since there are kids involved I cannot complete turn out the light, so I will attempt to dim it as much as I can. However, she does seem to react negatively to my lack of contact. For example, last weekend there was nothing about the kids to really address, so I did not have any contact for a few days. Then when I had kid she initiated disrespectful contact. Again this week same thing. However, thinking about it, her reactions in the last two weeks also come before S has a tournament which means we will be spending significant time together. So her triggers could be either one.

Not sure how to handle today? I have to get him weighed in and she will not take him (at least never has) and he will not want her to take him. Yet she still has not given me a time to pick him up. I definitely do not want to contact her and ask but also think she will see it as manipulative if I send son a text telling him to find out when I should pick him up. If any one has any ideas I would appreciate it.

At the same time I still have to figure out about filing for custody. At least I have two more days to think about it. I am really leaning toward it. I feel if I do not I am taking a real risk at her excluding me from his life. Even if she does continue to allow me to see him, I fear as her mood changes she will use him against me to continue to treat me as a door mat. I think since I have told her I have no expectation of ever saving our M, she lost holding that over me and is turning to the only means of control she has left.

If anyone has any advise I would appreciate it.