I understand what you are saying Sandi, I get that she has got an emotional connection to this OM and I know it is her thoughts and feelings that need to break down some how. I know I have always been a easy target of blame during our relationship for her failings/ mistakes as well as my own. I guess at the very least with her moving out, I can't be the target of the anger, guilt etc that is going on with her. Or whatever range of emotions she is feeling.
