Back again

[someguy1233]

W and I just had a conversation... the first real conversation since our marriage counseling appointment on Saturday when she let me know she was really thinking about separation.

She said she liked the idea that the therapist mentioned, having us alternate weeks in the house. The kids would stay put and we'd take turns being in the house.

I took a long time to think and told her that I didn't feel I should leave the house.
She got frustrated and gave me quite the stare-down while spewing, "you might want to think long and hard about that."

I thought for a bit and told her I didn't really have anything else to say as this is my home and where I live.

She calmed down a bit and said, it wasn't fair as this takes two people and we're both to blame. I told her only one person wants to leave.

I sat quietly for a while and I again told her I didn't really have anything else to say.

She got frustrated and asked when the lease is up for the current tenant at our rental property. I told her May 1. She said ok... so we can notify him to leave by May 1. She got frustrated again and said, "See what you're doing? You're forcing my hand on this. Is that what you want?" I told her I didn't understand. I said, "So you're saying I agree to leave or what happens?" She never really answered.

I thought for a bit longer and told her that a lawyer advised me to not leave the house. This really surprised her, "You're talking to a LAWYER?!" I replied, "Not recently, but I have in the past." I explained that rule number one is the guy never leaves the house, especially in our state where it's frequently viewed as abandonment and can lead to custody issues. If this heads towards divorce I can't risk that. I explained that you hear about things starting nicely and then spiraling into a cutthroat mess.

Hearing this is when the tears started from her. She said divorce would never go like that. She'd never hurt her kids like that. She'd never hurt her best-friend like that. (referring to me as BF!, ugh.) She said she'd never take my kids and that she wouldn't go for anything other than 50/50 custody.. She'd said she'd never take my money. She also said she wouldn't even want to get lawyers involved.

I thought for a while longer and told her I didn't really have anything else to say.

She went to the bedroom and said, "it would be nice if you could sleep somewhere else" as she shut the door. I could hear her crying for a few minutes...

There's a part of me that feels like really pushing the issue and going into the bedroom to sleep. But I know that's going to REALLY get her upset and could lead to a fight.