First this happened this morning: This morning our D5 was crying and wanted mom to ride with us to School. The WW looked at me and asked what happened, why is D5 acting like this? I looked WW in the eyes and said “seriously”? Our D5 is worried that mommy wont be around again, after she took off for 3 days then when she did return would only hang out for a few hours (she did move back in last weekend) Our S6 is also have emotional issues at School and we got a call yesterday from the teacher, he has not been himself for the last two weeks. Well guess what happened two weeks ago? She filed for divorce then left for the better part of a week. The WW got in the car and came with us, on the way home not a word was spoken.
I snooped!!! I know I shouldn't have but it did give me some great insight. She was in the garage talking to the OM and I could hear everything from the adjoining room.
Reality is starting to set in and she doesn't know what to do, she wished someone could just tell her what to do.
So here are the main points.
Seeing the kids hurting is killing her. We have not talked to them yet, she hasn't wanted to.
She doesn’t think I support her at all, even with the offer for her to move out take time before moving ahead with divorce. I regret offering that now.
She would rather die then stay married to me. She doesn’t love me, how can she work on it?
The OM tells her maybe she should stay married and try, that people do fall back in love and it would be best for the kids. WTH??
She is confused, hurting, and not sure what to do.
OM is working on his own stuff and not coming back anytime soon or at all.
She thinks she is a burden to everybody, we want her to be a Stepford wife.
Nobody supports or understands her, just the OM.
She just wants to get this “Stuff” done ASAP and be over with it.
The kids are the only thing causing her pause, she “doesn’t give an Eff about me”. I only see her as property and she is invisible to me. All her words.
She is tired
She is awoken to true love and can never go back to sleep.
She would love to go to his State/Town but can’t with the kids.
She goes on telling the OM how amazing he is, she would do anything in the world for him, blah blah blah.
What worries me the most is her comments, She feels there is not light, no answers, and no way out. She is a burden on everyone. Should I be concerned of her hurting herself?
Is reality starting to set in? Is she having second thoughts? Is she using the kids as an excuse on why she might be having second thoughts? Or Did he back out on her and now she is trying to pursue him?
What should I do next? Stay as much NC as I can, or work on 180’s? Should I move faster on the divorce stuff?
I think I am not detaching well!! Help!!
I still have not been served and it’s been 2 weeks.
