When asked what my course is, I don't really know what that is. Just focusing on my happiness and what's best for the kids, but I think that I have not truly accepted that she is going to do what she is going to do and I cannot control it. I am really struggling with my boundaries.
I think I need to go back to the drawing board and re-read DR. Goal setting and boundaries are something that I struggle with. Hard for me to define what is punishing and what is a true boundary. She hasn't admitted that she feels the way she does about OM. She has actually started to open up about things that bothered her and I am trying to take notes and validate. Really tough not to get angry, but since via text and email I get to take time and read the validations in newcomers and think about my response. I will post some of the recent from her and my replys for peoples feedback and advice. I am going to meet with 2 more L's this week and in the mean time do some studying.
When you say the unpleasant stuff what do you mean? Detaching, boundaries, goals?
I basically have the kids full time when not @ work but trying to GAL with them and also some new hobbies. Mountain Bike and motorcycle are a few on my list. You asked why I want to compliment her. I get to see a genuine smile and she kind of blushes when I do and I guess I just miss it. I won't do it as I am sure that falls under pursuing and not good for my detaching. I got a lot of work to do.
