Rednail: the high road

[Rednail]

Wonka- I promise I will do this when he gets off the headset with his friends and before he leaves. It made me feel like dirt for him to do that.

[Sparkls]

My WH did the same thing, only worse. I was staying at a friends to "Give him space" and he had her over to MY HOUSE (I own it completely by myself).
I kicked him out the next day.
Mature? No. The right thing to do? Who knows. But I wasn't going to let him keep doing that to me.

[Wonka]

Don't wait for him to get off the handset. Take action and address the problem assertively.

Catch it in action.

Strength and courage to you, my dear Red.

[Wonka]

Groan

Where's the edit button!!?

[Rednail]

He rolled his eyes and said fine I won't do it again in a douchebag voice then shooed me away.

I used my serious voice. I hope he took me serious.

I wish he would LEAVE

[Rednail]

My WH did the same thing, only worse. I was staying at a friends to "Give him space" and he had her over to MY HOUSE (I own it completely by myself).
I kicked him out the next day.
Mature? No. The right thing to do? Who knows. But I wasn't going to let him keep doing that to me.

Oh my gosh. That is horrible!! I do not know what I would do if that happened

[Sparkls]

I flipped sh*t at my friends house. I was this close to driving back to my house and kicking both them out on the curb (neither drives and it was like 2 degrees out). But what would that have accomplished. The next day, he went to a concert with her. The following day, while he was at work, I packed up all of his stuff, put it on the porch and left a note saying:
WH, for now I need you to not be in my home. You have hurt me more than I have words for not only in your initial actions but in your continued disregard and respect for me. I deserve better than this. We will discuss more when you get back from CO but for now, you aren't welcome here. I will take care of the dogs. Figure your sh*t out. Please go to your IC appointment ( he didn't). Call me if you need to talk.

Only thing I"ve heard since is him asking for his orthopedic pillow (he's got a back neck) and asking and I quote " May I use one of the TVs there for my xbox?"

[Sparkls]

Even his best friend and his cousin (who was visiting when OW showed up at my house, first time in 2 years and he was only there for the night) said how shitty he was being. It's things like this that make me want to walk away

*end rant* sorry, I'm waffling today between anger and despair

[Vanilla]

Red

He already has sweetheart. Your D4 commented on it.

Wonka, Red's WH did this to bait in my view.

I think enforcing boundaries with this WH in this entitled state is very dangerous indeed. Firstly it may trigger serious rage and frustration and secondly it may trigger worse.


It would be much better to record this and give it to L.

V

[Vanilla]

Hey Red don't beat yourself up, we all have issues here. Sad thing is the ones we are writing about seem to have more issues than we do. You keep doing you and working on you.

I really like the gray rock idea and the car camera idea. As a lawyer, I would love to video of spouse or x following the other in what we call protection from abuse cases. Certainly would help. If you are worried during exchanges pic a place with cameras outside. Walmart parking lots are good.

Also please consider a support group.

This is very interesting Tim, can you explain further. Especially the support group idea.

V