What the heck is this?

[2Times2Many]

Bright, Thank you for stopping by. I know you've had similar thoughts about how much to do for your h. Finding the right balance is difficult and it seems to change with the wind.

Peace, it does seem to be a choice between calm and chaos sometimes. I think my "child" surfaces every now and then and I want to start stomping my feet while I yell, "This isn't fair!"

But, you're right. I do want to go the wait it out direction and I felt really good with that until this lease business came up.

When I talked to him this morning, he was thanking me and saying he owed me a steak. He was oozing happiness over it all. I just couldn't bring myself to say, "No problem. Glad to do it." I suppose he picked up on that because he asked if I was ok. I replied that I was and I was glad I was able to help him out but if he was going to live over there he really needs to find ways to take care of this kind of stuff himself and not rely on me. I was completely calm and non-threatening, but it was obvious from his somewhat terse reply that he didn't like what I said.

(I swear, sometimes I think he's read DB. He's a master at "I'm sorry you feel that way" or "I'm sorry that happened" and other validating statements. But his aren't meant to validate. They're meant to bring an end to the discussion and/or change the subject.)

Oh well, back to the doghouse with me.

I'm so glad I have a few days off. I feel like I lost my focus and I need to get re-centered. I suspect my beacon needs recharging. But mostly, I need to move closer to that peace you referred to. I think so often that if I had one wish and could have anything I asked for, there would be no hesitation: peace.