Wow, mind is blown 13

[trumpet]

Uphill,

My W started to reconcile, but I didn't lay ground rules well at all. She's back to texting her OM in other city.

Be REALLY careful. Surgeon-precision careful. Let her talk. Hold your hand close to your chest. Actions, my friend, actions.

Has she gotten the help to understand where she was wrong? If not, you're headed for Groundhog's Day. Lather, rinse, repeat. If she's just intrigued that you might have another woman in your life, she's looking at you as an easy conquest. Is she stable? On meds? Where in life is she headed? What does forgiveness look like to her? What does selfless love to make the marriage work look like? What are your unfulfilled needs that were not met before, and would have to be met now to feel loved? What does she need to feel loved?

Put it on paper. Don't just talk about it. Write yours down - be very specific. I think your attitude of 'whatever' is actually a good one - you have built up a bit of space, and that is for your protection. She needs to see that - you are no longer hers to play with. It's just SO easy to let the heart slip back into the old slot it once was.