Was talking to friend. She thinks if we get back together it won't be forever. That we will end up divorced but later on.
She said she thinks if he does end up wanting reconciliation, it will only be because of finances and because it's the right thing to do. Not because he really wants me back because if he did he would have made an effort to see me. That if you truly love and miss someone, you want to be around them.
I get that totally. Truth is, I don't have much love for him right now either. I want to reconcile because I don't want to lose time with kids. I am fearful of moving forward. I am fearful of effect on kids. But I am also fearful of being in a loveless marriage.
I want to be loved and valued again. I don't know if husband is capable of that anymore. At one time he truly did though.
