I really think that once you heal from this is when H will feel the pain. I don't think walk aways escape the consequences of their actions.
My ex-wife left me 11 years ago. It killed me. She met someone else and I was dying. I slowly got over her and found someone new. Then SHE started pursuing me and threatening suicide.
It's crazy how the tables turned.
Red, you are going to get through this. It's going to hurt, but you are going to grow from this. It will take some time to process the pain (I'm going through it too) but you will feel better.
Your H is a jackass for leaving a great girl like you, he just doesn't know it yet. But he will.
