Red, do not dream that this pain will go away anytime soon. You could even recover a lot faster from a shot in your head or a stab in your body.
Emotional pain is tough. It goes away and when you think you are getting better, it comes and hit you down again.
Don't ignore it, don't underestimate it... instead deal with it, accept it... day after day you will manage it better. It is not going away very soon, but you will know how to handle it better as the time goes by.
The way I did regarding OW: (I am not always perfect but I try my best)
* I told my XH that I did not want my kids involved, close or talking about OW in any way or form. This was not a request, this was an order, period.
* I told his mom that I will visit their house until XH has another person visiting them. At that point I will decline any invitation if XH is there with OW. Again not just a request. It is my rule and period.
* I told XH that I do not want to be humiliated and he is all over the place with OW right on my face. I told him if he did, I would make his life miserable as much as I could. So do not step on my feet.
All this was business. I stated what was my boundaries regarding the B***h and no room for negotiation.
About what they do or don't by themselves, if they are together or not... well, it is not my business and I am OK with that.
In my sitch OW was never something that bother me too much because I knew some of the reason XH did that. He was being an idiot and took the easy way out. Some sitches are different and OW may be something else.
*** Be careful doing deals with your H, do not go into thinking you can deal with him about less this or that. You do not want to be unfair, but if it goes to D, let your L look at all aspects of the picture first. Do not tell you H anything that you may be OK of dealing with him. Do not feel sorry for the bastard.
You can love him to death, but you are not sorry if his financial life is ruined. He promoted this situation for himself. And he knows it. So, be careful he will play the poor me card on you at some point in time.
Remember that D is business.
CHICKEN SOUP... if you start with a few spoons at a time, it will help the stomach, it will help with mood, it taste pretty good, it will boost energy and it will protect your immune system and you won't get fat with it.
And a little bit of FIREMAN for that big smile on your face... made with some chocolate on the side? Or ice cream? I know you will laugh about it... You see, you are hurt, but not dead. Kkkkk
