Not sure where to stand

[Sotto]

I think there are some interesting themes here in terms of relational dynamics:

He knows I'm going to give them to him, that's who I am.

I tend to avoid conflict at all costs

He felt like I was always trying to parent him so if I tell him "No," it's just as bad.

I don't want to be his parent, I wanted him to step up and take responsibility and he seldom did.

Without reading back, can I ask if you have read codependent no more? It popped into my head when I was reading your post above and it's a book you may find helpful. I'm reading it at the moment.....

Hope this helps and take care xx