Hi Sandi and thanks for setting me straight - I need it!
I have no problem standing up to my wife - I do it all the time and hence the fights. That said, I don't think I know how to do it effectively. Feel silly asking, but in this fries example, when she called me on the phone and was short with me I simply said "well, anyway, I got fries" as I wasn't getting drawn into an argument over such a stupid thing and I was still getting them. Was there a better way for me to respond? Are there any situational examples for when a spouse speaks disrespectfully to you and what the ideal way is to respond? I need to learn more effective tactics. I just want her to know that I don't appreciate the way she is speaking to me.
Thanks for the detachment post - I can really appreciate how this could set you free. I must admit though, as much as it makes sense I'm struggling with its application. I'm so used to ignoring and pulling back when we are fighting - I need to break these bad habits. Again, if you have any situational examples that would be very helpful. Again, if the W is being disrespectful in her tone in the way that she is talking to you, do I just simply say "I don't appreciate you speaking to me with that disrespecting tone" and don't address what ever she was trying to say to me? Sorry for being so thick skulled about this but I can see that this is going to be vitally important for me moving forward no matter what happens.
