Well Thanksgiving was awesome, I thought. He said he was just pretending. We spent it together. Flew down to my brother-in-laws house, cooked dinner, slept in the same bed, cuddled, he rubbed my feet, deferred to me, made me drinks, laughed, yadda, yadda. And I gave him his space the entire time and even our family could see that he loved me and was coming to me. We were close on our flights, talked about him coming home...and then 1.5 weeks later.
Christmas was extremely difficult and I didn't know what to do with myself so my family flew me down to FL to get away for a few days. A chunk of my mom's family moved down there years ago, including my mother who I've struggled with my entire life and has been the biggest source of pain in my life - sorry was about to go off on a rant there. Nevertheless, I was miserable there and just wanted to come back home.
"Be messy and complicated and afraid and show up anyways."
