Just checking in. Still feeling pretty awful. Another Thursday night was a bust. A group of us go out for dinner every Thursday, and the last couple months there have been many cancellations. Last night was no different. Everyone backed out last minute.

Just for fun blackjack night tonight. As much as I hate cards, I will be going. Two good friends that I don't get to spend much time with will be there.

Down another 5lbs. 285 now.

I did find a video on YouTube to help me fall asleep. It is a hypnosis video for anxiety and depression to help sleep. While I don't know how much it actually works, just listening to the voice helps me disconnect mentally from the worries and I eventually fall asleep. I was awake at 2am again, started the video over, and fell asleep.

I may go home after work today and try to sleep for a couple hours before going out. Still wiped out.

Me:34
W:33
R: 15 years
M: 7 years
W moved out: 11/21/15
BD: 11/20/15 - ILYBINILWY, PA once
LRT: 12/14/15