I should add that we were having sex until around Christmas time when the fighting really escalated but nothing since. As for the question about physical appearance, about 1.5 years ago both my wife and I were fed up with how we felt, we were slightly over weight and wanted to make a change so both started working out. Fast forward to now, we both workout every other day and I myself have gone from 210lbs to 183lbs and found out I have muscles in my stomach! lol. Not to toot my own horn but I think I'm a fairly attractive guy especially since losing the pounds and getting into shape. My wife now has a killer body as well!
I believe my wife to mean that she "isn't attracted to me anymore" as a person any more (not so much physically). With all the fighting over the years I guess I can't blame her. Women need more than a hot guy to make them feel attracted to them - they want an emotional connection and that is what I believe is broken right now. I must admit I do try and tease her with my new physique here and there when getting changed in the room or coming out of the shower etc but very subtly. Otherwise, things have been very calm since the first seemingly disastrous MC meeting 2 days ago. If I'm honest, and maybe I'm just overly optimistic, I don't think my wife wants to actually split from me. I think she will do or say anything to try and make a change in our relationship - and I'm learning (from this forum) not to react to often exaggerated statements or in some case complete lies. Let her vent - get it out, acknowledge her feelings and my wrong doing if I actually did something wrong (but not otherwise) and move on.
As for the housework issue, I really stated my case well at the initial MC meeting and worded it in a way that my wife had never heard before. Basically said, the way I look at it we both work full time jobs. Mine is out of the house 9 - 5, hers is in the house 5 hours a week part-time job, the rest of the hours of each day she is to run the house and everything that goes along with that. If we were both to punch in at a time clock, at the end of the week we would probably both have worked the same number of hours, and that's fair. To expect me to come home and then do half of her job isn't fair. Further, if W were to take a full time job then I would then have to take on half the household work to compensate and that would also be fair. W responded you've never said that before - I have but not in such a clear way - MC didn't say anything.
I wish I could find more time in the day to read through all of the links and posts - will do my best! Thanks again everyone - your feedback and comments are really helping an awful lot!
