Hope is not a Strategy- It looks done

[rich4j]

Geez...the days are just getting harder and harder being under the same roof.

I have stopped posting as much but I need to more as its good therapy.

My STBX came back again from another weekend trip as she/I try to not be in the same house during weekends.

Her venom was toxic this time as she came home saying she had a knot in her stomach walking in the door seeing me. Nice! How are you on Valentines day!

As some of you know, I have gone back n forth on her having anothter sweetheart in the town she continues to visit but I think I have finally gotten to the point that I DONT CARE.

I read alot of posts of some of you that at least have one foot in the door which is a good sign and a few who are in a similar sitch as me with D papers being filed , an angry WAW under the same roof and having kids in the picture

She actually came back from her trip again and asked when I was leaving, why I wouldn't get a temp apartment, what is taking my L so long etc....

And went into a rant about how this was all my fault again and had the nerve to actaully say I had manipulated her during our relationship. That floored me...I asked to explain and she said with certain things like thinking about us putting an addition on the house, I would somehow manipulate her into thinking we couldn't afford it, it would be too painful etc.... That....crossed the line for me....and declared she had entered the world of nuttie and cut off the conversation

Things are so tense that I actually have crossed over the river to the side of the bank where I want to go and have a start fresh. I only look to protect my daughter and ensure she is way above all of this and we can shield her heart from being hurt. Makes me cry even writing this...about her as I spent a great weekend with her. Makes me resent my STBX soooo much when I think about my daughter. I took my D to lunch today and watched all the other families again with mom, dad, kids and made me super sad. I tried to refocus on having fun and conversation with her as she is precious

I know once I am out of here, and have my custody aligned so I can spend quality time with my daughter that things will be OK. It will be quiet , a bit lonely, but everyone gets a fresh start and that is what I can only focus on now

Vent over