I am ruining my own marriage. Yesterday was hard. It was a bad day. I felt very unloved and sad. I made a horrible mistake today. I ended up in bed with him. I do not know why. I am guessing it was because I felt so awful and low from yesterday that I just wanted to feel at least a little wanted. Now I feel like I'm ruining my chances of ever getting him back.
Good parts: I know he still sexual wanta me. Bad parts: I let him cake eat, it probably meant nothing to him, I feel like a booty call, I feel like I threw away all the progress I had in a 24 hour period.
I do not like this roller coaster feeling. I just went back on my medicine my doctor has me on after a week or so off of it. Im tired(insomnia) the last 2 days. I went to bed at 12-3 yesterday and 1:35 until 5:25 last night. I have been super emotional, I have 0 appetite and feel pretty miserable with a migraine.
I first started the medicine the same month he left so I do not know if these are temporary side effects from stopping then starting again or if I am just having an extremely hard time dealing with everything the last two days.
Some side effects can include: rage,anger, increased sex drive, dry mouth, emotional, depression etc. I kinda hope it is from starting them back up on Saturday morning. I was really feeling great and now I'm just a mess.
