The start of my Happiness 3

[broke]

Tyler12,

I think the "roller coaster" of saying you are letting go and then getting sucked back in into wanting to reconcile is completely normal. Or, at least, I hope it is because I feel like that happens to me all the time. Just when I think that I am moving forward toward acceptance, something happens to drag me back to desperately wanting to reconcile. Do you ever feel like you are "faking it"? I do!

I love your visualization of the rope and how heavy it is. I intend to use that to help me as I move towards making myself stronger for whatever lies ahead. I, too, have a tremendous attachment to my H and family. My counselor said while that means it will take longer to detach from him, she also said the good news is that those of us that have attached so strongly will definitely attach in the future. Except in the future, I think the rope shouldn't be so heavy for us. A healthy relationship probably has different size ropes at different times and both people have to hold the rope to help the other.

Really great insight in your post. Thank you for sharing - I can relate to a lot of what you said but haven't been able to put it into words myself.