REALLY trying to detach...but GALing regardless!#4

[- MB -]

MB. I am sorry you had to go through that. I don't want to imagine OM showing up to chat because I am positive one of us would end up in the hospital. And since I have no shame in fighting dirty I don't believe it would be me. It took an amazing amount of courage and self control from you ( in my eyes) to sit and talk to her.
Although In doing so I hope you received some clarity as painful as it may have been. Moved yourself closer to self peace.

it is hard for almost everyone here to stop beating themselves up on what they could have done or what they shouldn't have done. To stop asking themselves what they can do and should t do. In doing so I think it makes it harder to keep going on.
The events and actions of the past are exactly that. The past and can not be changed, altered or removed in any way shape or form.
So that leaves moving forward and we have to do so for ourselves to make our own lives better, for ourselves not for S.

I like yourself I think have a hard time believing we can be happy without our S, but we can MB. Maybe not today or tomorrow but we will! And I will be here to help as much as I can until we are

Tyler, thanks for taking the time to write me! I don't care to ever see that person again, but I'm not sorry that I talked to her. It wasn't the easiest thing in the world to do , but I had been wanting to talk to her anyway. I would have never contacted her though. She even commented on that. Said that she and my H were both confused as to why I hadn't contacted her. I told her it was because I wasn't in a relationship with HER. My relationship was with MY H and he's the one I'm mad at. I didn't take my vows with her and she didn't promise to love and be with me forever. That was H. Am I the only one in the world that thinks this way? Now don't get me wrong, I do NOT like her. We will never be friends. The thought of her makes me want to vomit. But, that being said, she is still not the one that I want to take this up with, it's him.

It was so hard to listen to her talk to me about my H like she was an expert on him. Seriously? After 4 months she knows him better than me? And the condescending way she talked to me made me want to smack her. And, telling me how MY life was, like I didn't know what the truth was. UGH! The part that was probably the hardest was listening her brag about how GREAT my H thoughts sex was with her, listening to her brag about all the money he's spending on her and showing me the diamond ring on her left hand, and listening to her tell me that "It''s like I'm you now."

I actually felt good about things when I got out of her truck. I did get some clarity about things and I am glad about that. And, you can ask NYGal.....but this seems to have shoved me right into the angry phase of this mess. I wasn't sure I'd ever make it there, but I did. I must say that I like feeling angry towards him rather than sad and lonely! Now if only NYGal would join you and I over here in angry land!

Tyler, I hope you're right about being happy without them. I'm counting on it! Really hoping that we can all find that soon!