One for the road....

[Zues126]

Each R teaches us a new lesson

I don't like the endorsement of serial relationships.

If someone ends the relationship, obviously we have to keep going. But I think relationships should teach us how to find happiness and make a partnership work, not how to pack it in and look for greener grass.

But that's not the world I live in, I'm working on accepting that. I touch acceptance at times. I'll get there.

You make the assumption here that the statement refers to romantic R. It doesn't and in any case who says all Rs need to work perfectly or that we should try to make them all life long?

V

I definitely considered this was aimed at non-romantic relationships, but I find it unlikely this is what the book was aimed about. Romantic relationships have a degree of intimacy far beyond friendships, and we reflect more on them when they end. Even if I'm wrong and this wasn't what the book was about I was still voicing my opinion.

I don't think all R's need to work perfectly, when I spoke of finding happiness I meant within a flawed R, not a magical unicorn that fulfilled us. Unfortunately that is what people are looking for.

As for the idea they should be permanent, I do subscribe to it. I believe we lived that way for thousands of years, in small communities, with our partners for life, raising children, being part of a bigger unit. This idea that we are individuals and should be free to pursue happiness has not led to happiness but rather widespread confusion, chaos, and discontent. The freedom to chase happiness equates to the freedom to abandon the things we later learn hold true meaning. And we rob ourselves of the chance to find happiness in what we are given as we strive to get what we think we deserve.

Again, just my thoughts. I recognize I am in the minority. Right or wrong we are in a culture in which we partner, walk, grow, partner, walk, grow, find someone that fits the new us, journey for a while, walk again, grow some more. I just think the true lesson is there to be had, and we are walking away from growth not towards it. But since this is the world I have to live with it. I am making progress. I don't agree, and I'll play my cards differently. But I won't let my disapproval interfere with my appreciation for what this life has provided for me.

Thanks V. JB, I've got some words for you too, just trying to find a way to voice it.