Ms. Hairdog is turning 41 on Monday. Last year, for #40, I got her diamond earrings. It was like pulling teeth, because gift receiving is not her LL, and I had to make her go to the jewelry store and pick out several possibilities. I wanted something that would last. She was happy to receive them.
This year, I'm not looking to spend a bunch of money. Just something nice. I was thinking about getting her a gift certificate for a massage place she goes to, but she gets massages from this place about every month anyway. It's like giving her cash out of the same well she would use anyway.
Her LL's are acts of service and quality time. Any ideas? I'd like them to be romantic, but remember, she's about as romantic as a post. I do love her, though.
Sorry if I'm pointing out the obvious, but since you KNOW what her LL's are, have you considered ACTING on that knowledge? Like maybe giving her the night off... I mean REALLY off. No cooking, cleaning, dealing with kids - you take care of ALL of that. Let her put her feet up, relax, have a bath, whatever. She can read, watch TV, anything she desires. All night (evening). No demands on her at all. Would that be an Acts of Service gift?
Or how about a bunch of homemade certificates for things like cooking, cleaning, Wild Card (she gets to decide), and whenever she presents one, she gets that, no questions asked.
Hmmm, Tim. Up until a couple of weeks ago when I basically demanded that she either cook OR clean up after dinner, you just desribed her normal Monday night. She'll often say to me, "I'm beat. Mind if I just take a bath and read?" My answer is always yes.
I was going to fix dinner (going out is not really an option during the week), and I'll even clean up afterward, since it's her birthday.
The coupon book idea is nice, but basically, all she has to do is ask, and I usually say yes.
Well, then, you may have to be a bit more inventive. Apparently, receiving gifts is not one of her LL's, you said as much yourself, and even diamond earrings didn't really "do it" for her. If her LL's truly ARE acts of service and quality time, I'm guessing that if you found a way to do something REALLY special along those lines, she would feel loved by it, which is really the point.
What about taking her out a very nice Dinner, Maybe some candle lights. Then if she is into dancing go out dancing. Send the kids to families to spend the night. When you get home a nice back rub with Oil, with just candles burning with her favorite music playing in the back ground. The next morning breakfast in bed.
I thought we might have had SOMETHING in common!! *giggle*
One of my horses is having a birthday on Monday also!! He will turn 28. Yep, really. (I have another one that turns 34 this year, believe it or not.) If my philosophy on commitment is not evident to my H by the relationship I have had with these animals for decades, then I certainly can't convince him of that with words now can I?
Anyway, I'm not real sure what my horse's LL is, but I do know he is very, very fond of food, so I will probably get him some carrots or apples and if he is at all appreciative of that gesture, he might get a back rub too, or at least a good all-over brushing.
Hope this helps some!
Have a great weekend, LG
A blessed and happy marriage is a union of two forgivers and Him, because...a cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12.
I know this doesn't help with "togetherness" for you and your W but it's her b-day. Pick something she wants. How about a night out for her with a few of her girlfriends on you? Last year for my GF's 40, her husband rented a limo, made dinner reservations, and got movie tickets for her and her 3 best friends, all at his expense, and he watched their 7 (yes 7) kids. We had a blast and from what she told us the next day he had a great time when she returned home that night. Sometimes women just need to be with their girlfriends especially at B-day time after you hit 40.
*giggle*
