I do want to ask about if WW comes back. You said a stipulation would be to share a bed right off the bat? I can see positives and negatives from that. Not that I am expecting her back any time.
Yes, but again, this is not to say he should expect her to desire sex him right off the bat. I don't think he should push for that part right away. However, he should require her to share the same bed and present the opportunity for emotional intimacy with each other, so they will gradually work toward having the sexual intimacy.
The reason I said she shouldn't be the one to lay down stipulations is b/c first, she really is not, or should not, be in the position of giving him any stipulations. He is a fool if he allows her to do so. And the second reason I said this is b/c I have actually seen men here on the board, who let the WW come back on her terms, and she took a separate bedroom, and from that point on, they were never like husband & wife again. They shared the same house, and that was all. They were, at best, friends. So, if want you want to see a passive man who lets his WW rule the roost, just let that happen and you've got it. You will die from a lonely and unhappy life. Some people think not having their spouse in the house with them is lonely, and I say not having your spouse ever in bed with you, makes for a lonely, unhappy extensistence. If there is no physical issue that causes the couple to need separate rooms, they need to be together in the same bedroom.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
