The other area is rebellion. It may start slowly and more subtle, or it may break lose in a furious attack of every moral principle she held. B/c of the deep resentment and the disrespect she feels for him, her attraction for him falls by the wayside. He is not the man she fell in love with, and the sexual desire has left. After awhile, she just feels empty and craves for something to fill that emptiness. She may turn to various activities, friends, or whatever trying to fill the unhappy void in her life. Emotionally, she is done with her H and the MR. She may not realize it, or may not care, but she is in a vulnerable state of mind..........and in fact, her entire mindset has been changing into a direction her family will not understand, nor will they recognize the women she becomes. It may come subtley or brazen, but usually something/someone is going to appeal to her and cause her to feel alive again. She will feel as if she is being offered oxygen to a sufficating body. Women will respond in various ways, but they will respond b/c their mindset is set for rebellion. In some cases, she may intentionally go seeking something, and then she may act like girls gone wild. Whatever or however, she will display some form of rebellion against her H, her M, and anyone who tries to stop her. If her friends don't like it, then she drops them and finds new friends. Usually, the new friend(s) will be divorced, maybe in an A themselves, hitting the bar/party scene, while leaving their kids at home with the H.....or whoever will keep them. She will forsake her parents, kids, religion, career, marriage, and every principle she ever held dear....if they interfere with her new lifestyle. If she doesn't get her way, she will react in fury, hatefulness, pouting, craying, throwing a fit, on & on. She acts worse than any melodramatic teenager imaginable. She has turned into a selfish monster that nobody recognizes, least of all, her husband.
Okay, so back to the question of what should a nice-guy husband do with a wayward wife. These three areas I have described are the enemies. He needs to bear in mind that that is the source of her waywardness, and he is not going to nice her out of it. He is not going to persuade her to give him another chance to prove how great he can be. She is done, over, and out of the MR. She will not hear a single word he says, as long as she has no respect for him. I don't think LBH's truly get it, b/c they have this idea that they need to show the WW more love. WHAT?? Read my lips........she does not want you showing her how much you love her! At this point, that's the last thing she wants. He needs to understand he is dealing with a different creature. Unless a woman has experienced being wayward herself, or a man has gone through the hell of having a wife who is wayward.....I honestly don't know if other people realize that the general advice someone gives for a troubled MR, simply doesn't work when it involves a wayward. The WW has a different mindset, and it is dark and very unattractive.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
