Wife has filed for divorce

[excile101]

In reply to your questions, I don't see similar behavior to our last separation but yes, we swept many issues under the rug, partly because my w just wanted us to"be" instead of discussing our problems at length.
After a honeymoon period, we had another child and the same behaviors returned. We didn't talk or nurture our marriage. My wife would send me texts in an angry tone explaining how she felt. I would get scared that she would leave and I would withdraw into myself and distance myself hoping to weather the storm. My w did everything around the house and with the kids. She made all the decisions and eventually didn't even ask me my opinion on anything. She says she felt like she had another child to look after and lost respect for me. She feels that I am not strong or impressive and no longer feels attracted to me and that sex became mechanical.

She says that deep down she still has love for me but it is locked away as she cannot risk being hurt again and that in the future her heart may soften but right now she wants out. She thinks that because we separated before, I have had my chance so divorce is the only option.

We had a good few days where we talk about the kids, I help around the house share a bottle of wine in the evening. She became more receptive and happy to see me. She even fixed me lunch. I feel that she looks at me when I am playing with the kids, almost analyzing me.

Then in a cheerful voice she asks me if I have seen any properties to move into yet. This makes me feel dejected as it reinforces that she wants me to leave. I continue to be act happy around her and be helpful. I compliment her on little things like how she does her hair instead of just thinking it. She likes it.

I know I have to become a better man. I have lost my confidence and don't know where to start in building myself up. I go to counselling but it doesn't really help. I am starting a high end job very soon which will give me financial security and new responsibilities but that is all I have right now and I don't know how to detach from her as she is love of my life, I just failed to see it for so long.

Cadet has not sent me any homework which I would appreciate.