Baby steps

[Painter]

Just had an interaction with H that I would like input on:

We sat down to watch TV, and I couldn't get the sound to work. Tried different controls and turning the TV off and on again. Still no sound.

H went off on me and said that this is what he's said over and over, that I let the TV stay on for hours and hours on end without watching, and now I had broken it.

It's not true that I leave the TV on without watching it - what will happen is that I'm watching/listening from the kitchen while cooking dinner, then he comes home and we start talking, then he goes into the living room and asks "why is the TV on when nobody's watching?" and I tell him I was watching until he walked in the door.

Lather, rinse, and repeat.

Suggestions for how to handle this? I think it's so unfair and nasty that I have a hard time staying calm. I pointed out that the TV is almost 10 years old and I did *not* leave it on for hours without watching.

Right after that, the sound worked and H claimed I hadn't turned it up high enough when I was trying earlier. Maybe, maybe not - I don't know. I thought I did.

I took my dinner and ate in my office. I'm there now, but my back hurts so I think I'm going to go to bed. The strange thing is that we had just a little earlier had a short, but joking exchange about how he blames me for everything - I said, 'I know I'm to blame for everything that hasn't turned out the way you wanted it in your life', and he replied, 'You're damn right you are! That's great that you finally got it!'

He's been much more aggressive lately. It's similar to when he first got involved with OW.