REALLY trying to detach...but GALing regardless!#3

[- MB -]

MB,
Questions:

1-What was H like before you married him?
2-How long was your courtship before getting engaged?
3-What were the dynamics with the sets of children prior to marriage?
4-How and where did you meet H?

That will be all for now as I am interested in learning more about the backstory of your pre-M years.

Wonka, thank you so much for taking the time to try to help me. I really appreciate it! I feel so lost and don't know what I'm supposed to be doing.

Before we got married, I always told H that he was the sweetest man that I had ever known. And, at the time, it was true. He called and texted me all the time. We talked for HOURS on the phone ever day. He told me what a great person I am. When I would tell him something about my X, he would always say he didn't know how anyone could ever treat me that way. Always complemented me. Bought me little things. Liked to take me out. Tried to look out for me and protect me. Was so nice to my kids and told me that he wanted to be their dad. He always shaved and tried to look nice for me. I just can't really think of anything about him that was bad during that time.

This was our second engagement. I was also engaged to him when I was 18 and I broke off the engagement because I got tired of it being a long distance relationship. This time we were together for almost 2 years before getting engaged. During that time, we were always on the phone together and would see each other on weekends and I would also go see him whenever my XH had the kids for his visits.

As for the children, H has 2 kids and I have 4. We both had primary custody of our kids. His 2 kids were the same ages as my middle 2 kids. The kids didn't actually meet each other until about 4 months before we got married. They actually all got along well though. The played together and seemed to like each other. Well, all of them except for my youngest. His kids never fought. I mean not ever. In all the years that we've been together, I have never heard his kids argue, fight, call each other names, get mad at each other...nothing. I was freakishly weird. Never really knew what to make of it. Anyway, they liked my older 3 kids, but seemed to think that I had my youngest child specifically for them so they could pick on her and make fun of her. That was a constant source of tension around the house after we married and moved in together. But, as I said, they only met about 4 months before we got married and didn't see each other that often.

I met my H origionally when I was 16. I worked at a fast food place and he came in and ordered food and flirted with me a LOT. As it turned out, he had just graduated, but I knew his sister from school. My parents moved our family 8 hours away when I was 17. My we continued our relationship long distance for a year and a half and even got engaged. I broke off the engagement and eventually married someone else. He didn't contact me for 18 years, then called me out of the blue. We talked on the phone for a couple of months, then eventually met in person. It basically just went on from there. We were both married and unhappy at the time. His XW was an alcoholic and drunk all the time. My XH and I had been VERY happy for the first 10 years we wer married, then it's like he woke up one day and lost his mind. He became abusive and I was trying to get away from him.

Anyway, that's pretty much it. I'm not really sure how such a sweet man turned into the person that I'm married to, but I want the origional version back. I'm sure it's the version that he's showing to ow otherwise she would be running not chasing.