Oh goodness, MB... The things your H has done to you are abuse, plain and simple. Even if he never laid a hand on you. I DO hope you are getting counseling for your own well-being. I really wonder if H is even capable of being in a healthy relationship right now, based on the things you've written. And as you already know, no matter how much we love someone, we can't fix or save them. They have to do it for themselves. But before that happens, they first have to realize their actions are wrong/hurtful and take responsibility for them. It does not sound like H has reached that place yet.
