Maybe I didn't handle it the best... but my W really thought this guy was perfect. So when I saw the chance to show her this guy is lying to you and using you I took it. I didn't seek it out. The OMW contacted me so I just used what she said.
I was at the point of filing because I thought she would never get over him and give us a chance to see if we could figure it out. I still am not sure where she stands with OM. But I do know she is pissed at him.
So maybe it was a mistake how I handled it, but when I saw a chance to ruin her happy fling I took it. She has taken so much from me I thought it was justified.
It's impossible to save a marriage when there are more than two people in it. You know where I stand on getting affairs squashed like the nasty little things they are. That event may help her step back and assess herself. She won't like what she finds. Then again, maybe it won't. Some of the things you said in earlier posts were very good. If you truly have the strength to walk away from this marriage then you're doing very well. That is also an event that contributes to them waking up and lifting the fog.
Sometimes when the fog lifts, they still don't want the marriage. You have to be ready for that too. I think you're doing fine. There is no perfect solution for this or there would be no divorce. Stay the course.
