Sorry for the pain you are experiencing. What are the ages of you and your H? Do you have children?

Have there ever been any affairs (any type) from either side? Is this the first M for both of you?

Do both of you work from home?

Do you suspect another woman in the picture?

Sorry for so many questions. The answers will help us have a clearer idea of your situation.

It sounds as if your H may be going through some type of life crises. Has anything major happened the last couple of years, like losing a parent or extremely close friend? Did he suffer financial ruin or some other experience that could have thrown him into a state of depression?

I can hear the urgency in your post, and I hear the pain of rejection. What I am going to advise is for you to keep the home front going. Don't neglect the chores and things that need doing. Try to keep it looking warm and inviting.

Hope, please take exceptional care of your health during this time. This will probably not be over in a few short months. I hope it will, but from the accounts I have read on this board for 8 yrs, I've discovered it usually last longer. Btw, I have been here 8 years b/c this board helped save me when I was in such a mess. I am here now, hoping to pay forward any help that I can.

Okay, so stay on a good diet, get plenty of sleep (even if you have to go to the doctor for a prescription), and exercise every single day. Those the physical needs. Next, take care of your emotional/mental part. Do you have a close friend or family who will support you so that you won't feel completely alone? I am not talking about you getting advice from them. In fact, it would be difficult for them to be unbiased, so save that for the board. I just meant you need to be around those people who love you and will help to fill the gap of rejection. Also, get inspiration from listening to great music that gets your blood pumping. Don't listen to sad country western songs or love songs. Don't watch sad movies. This is not the time to subject yourself to extra pain, and that sort of thing seems to affect us. Make this a personal mission of focusing on you to come through this in top condition.

Get involved in something new. Try a new hobby. Go somewhere you have never been. Experience new things. Meet new people. Reach out and volunteer to help an elderly person or someone disabled who lives near you.

This is probably nothing like you wanted to hear, is it? You wanted advice in how to get your H back home. Well, I'm working on it. wink. However, there are no guarantees that he will do anything. The WAH or MLC H's are far and few here on the board, however, the ones I have read about say that when they saw their W do the things I am telling you, it somehow did a work on him. The W was involved in life, and she was looking great, and the biggest thing of all.......she seemed happy, in spite of what he was doing. She drew him back by letting him go. She did not cry, beg, guilt him, be clingy, threaten, complain, act helpless, or any of those type things we women are so infamous in doing. When you stop and think about it, why would any man want to go home and be with a woman like her?

Hope, you are going to need to make yourself happy, and don't look to him to do it.

I have to get ready for work. I will come back when you've had time to answer my questions.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!