dknyc, I am sorry to see you here and to read your story. I know the pain you are speaking about, ultimatums that are rejected, sleepless nights and not knowing what to do next.
Right now, take a deep breath. Pull away from W for your sake. Get out of your home for a few hours, and surround yourself with friends and family. Don't answer any questions your W has right now. Are you exercising?
And stop snooping. It is only causing you pain. You already know what is going on.
