Long time

[job]

Nel,
Welcome to the MLC Forum. I'm sorry you are here, but we have so many wonderful posters who will drop by and post from time to time.

So, let's begin, how are you doing? Are you taking care of yourself? Stress can create a lot of health issues, so you'll need to take care of yourself.

As for your h, it sounds like he took a short breather during his crisis and he's picked up where he left off a few years back. Sometimes when there is a crisis going on, such as you experienced w/the breast cancer, they'll wake up just a bit and panic that we might not be there for them and thus, they talk about themselves to us and yes, even do things w/us as a family unit and also talking about moving back in w/you....it's just a period of clarity because they will eventually will dive right back into the rabbit hole.

His crisis isn't over. In fact, I would venture to say he's still in replay and will most likely be there for quite some time. What do you do? You continue moving forward. Live your life to the fullest and do the things that you've never had the time to do. You can leave the door ajar and if your h ever wakes up, he will know where you are and will do the necessary work to win you back...but you need to allow him to grow up and prove he is worthy of you again. That means, actions speak louder than words. He's got a lot of heavy work to do. Let him go for now.

For now, be a friend, allow him to come to you. Do not contact him unless it is an emergency or something to do w/your daughter. Truly, the best thing to do is just leave him alone to figure things out. When he contacts you, listen, do not judge and if he does something nice, be sure to thank him.

Try to keep the focus on YOU and your daughter. It's difficult to do when you've got this going on, but you have to try to do it. Dig deep for patience and understanding.