Thanks RD. Yes I know, but every now and then it gets frustrating! Anyway, the flat painting is going well (the guy should be finished fairly soon) so, i think I might get to go to a cheeky GAL activity today! Never did want much money anyway!
Yes, I feel strong, but that doesn't stop the nagging doubt that I might have got something wrong and if I'd done something differently, it would be different etc. etc. All nonsense, I know, but I wouldn't be human if I didn't question myself.
M 45 W 52 SD22 S9 D8 BD 6 April 2015 Not living together 4 Dec 2015
I'm being encouraged to go on one of those internet dating sites, but I'm not sure. People tell me that this may encourage W to think quicker about coming back, but my feeling is that this may well push her away further and cement her ideals.
There is no way to know how W will react, so I would not base your decision on what you think it may do to/for her or your relationship with her.
For me, I was not ready to start dating until I knew that I would not give up my relationship with the new person if XW ever turned around.
That said, as far as I remember, nobody has filed for any actual divorce in your case. So, are you actually ready to move on...?
I guess I won't be ready for a long time even though I have looked at internet dating websites. Mainly it was just to reassure myself that there are other women out there.
The touch , scent and company of a woman is what I also miss. It's 8 months since I had sex and just as along since I even kissed W
Me49 W45 T15 M13 S11 S8 BD 11/15/11 & 3/27/12 Moved out 4/9/12 Moved back 4/23/12 W working on US 5/20/12 Now Piecing! May-Oct14 drifting Dec 14 W agrees to more QT BD Oct15 ILYBINILWY W filed 1/25/16
Isittoolate I can relate to your post yes the idea of dating scares me too and to be honest I sometimes think fnck this who needs this but I stand by my marrage
I need to loose my fear of being alone and being without my wife life would actually be so much less stress and I feel I am getting to the point where I am realising that living in the same house is not much fun. Way too many triggers
W told me,she is going out Saturday to a bar with her girl friend so I need to child mind ....so my mind starts to race
Then she has a moan at me because I have not taken my daughter to her horse my daughter did not ask me to do it my daughter right now wants very little to do with me so my wife talks down to me in front of my daughter ......"so your the adult why did you not take her you have just been sitting there". No I have been doing some work.
I am no longer reacting to these outbursts and just remain silent.
I will get through this
Here is to a happier day
Me:48 W 41 M:18 T:26 2 D 18 & 4 2 S 17 & 13 Bomb: 20/7/2015 in house separation D filed 06/17 Separate houses 10/17 D Final 29/12//17.
So, how many of you are hiding under the bed this morning? Yes, it's valentines day, but it's just a day.
Don't spend all day holding your head in your hands, weeping, gnashing your teeth, get up and get out. It's what I'm gonna do!
Last year, I went all out for my W; the roses, the chocolates, the card etc. etc. and it didn't stop what hapenned, so don't ponder the what ifs and the whys, you're here for a short time, so make it a fun time!
Remember, it's just a ploy to make you buy lots of rubbish. If you love somebody, you don't need a day to show it!
M 45 W 52 SD22 S9 D8 BD 6 April 2015 Not living together 4 Dec 2015
I agree Huddy - well posted! For sure, it may not be the easiest day - but I hope we can all put our sitches on the 'back burner' and have the best day possible. Be grateful for the love and connections we have to others & celebrate that. As Huddy says, get out and about & make the most of today.
Huddy, I'm glad to read you are doing well. It sounds like your W's housing situation has improved a little, which is good for the kids I'm sure.
Happy Valentine's Day to you and I hope you have a good day. The sun is shining here & I'm having a party later for my D group chums.
Take care & thanks for being an inspiration to others here xx
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
I just wanted to drop by and say hi Huddy. It has been a long struggle for you, but you are going to be okay. I can tell your posts sound stronger.
I don't know about the dating sites, either. When I was in my waywardness, I was on one that seem to just want to find a f--k buddy (as was the term used). I do believe there are women out there that are in the same place as you find yourself, who are scared about getting into the dating scene again and really just want to enjoy the company of a man. Being honest and upfront about not looking for a committed R at the moment, and wanting to ease back into dating may be the way to approach it. But hey, what do I know about the dating scene? (lol)
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
It's just a hall mark holiday IMO. Like you said, just and excuse to buy cr@p you don't want. Not that I'm not romantic or anything.
Anyway. Dating? Tough one mate. Very tough. Dip your toe and see where it does. Your BS meter is fully charged so you'll spot a fake a mile off. But no expectations. Desperation isn't an attractive trait.
Me:43 Her:42 M:14 S:9 EA started 2014/03 (or there abouts) PA started 2014/05/30 BD:2014/11/05 I left 2015/10/01 I returned 2015/05/02 She left 2015/06/10 OM still on the go.
