You have an L, right? What do they say about finances and all? I'm not going to claim to be able to give advice in that area. Go with what the L states and will protect your daughter the most.
Do not forget this in your worst feeling moments: DBing is to save your marriage and/or to save yourself. You know the steps you need to take to keep moving forward.
If you can before your sit down, go out and GAL for a bit. You'll need to come from a place of strength and (faked) serenity to make it through the discussion.
M: 8.5 T:10 Me:37 W:34 S:6
Retrouvaille and W moves back- 7/31/15 Piecing - 7/4/15 to present
My WW believes the same nonsense. Our D3 is resilient and she needs to see mommy happy. She completely ignores the facts that she is teaching D3 that affairs are acceptable and that it's ok to run away from your problems. Clearly not messages that I want to send.
Me:44 W:38 T:10.5 M:7.5 D:3 BD: 7/2015 W moves out of MBR: 9/2015 WW files for D: 2/8/2016
Also my W is gal pro. If she doesn't have the kids she can not stay home or be alone
OTW- she must know my STBX....always out. And even when our D is home alot of times she gets a babysitter so she can go workout, play tennis etc.....nice life that will be changing drastically soon
_________________________ Me-48 Spouse-WAW 52 Married for 10 years D7 ILYBNILWY 7/15 Suspect EA/PA 12/15 No confirmation/denial She files 1/2016 Working towards the Big D ...still in progress....
Our D3 is resilient and she needs to see mommy happy. She completely ignores the facts that she is teaching D3 that affairs are acceptable and that it's ok to run away from your problems.
OMG-resilient should say "they don't understand yet but when they do, it will impact them"
SELFISH-go be happy right? Yes....let's make sure she is happy and it will help everyone! obviously sarcastic but it seems to be the trait of the WAW WAH...
It is unfortunately a proven fact the negative impact of divorce on children of any age.
My STBX keeps saying our living arrangement under 1 roof and not spending time together is hurting our daughter. She is confused and starting to ask questions.
I do think its not the best situation. But the alternative of dropping the D bomb on her too as a 6 yr old.....when we haven't figured this all out in terms of living, who leaves, etc.....
_________________________ Me-48 Spouse-WAW 52 Married for 10 years D7 ILYBNILWY 7/15 Suspect EA/PA 12/15 No confirmation/denial She files 1/2016 Working towards the Big D ...still in progress....
Lol. Even with my kids verbally telling her they do not like her house they want us together and she is different. W still thinks she is doing right for them.
M 37 W 34
T 12 M 8 D 7 S 4
Need break 4/12/15 W no ring 7/7/15
Separate room 4/12/15 Separate living suggested 8/15 W moved out 11/1/15
I'm having same issues. Although I try not to believe a thing STBX said, she's claimed that her L has told her a happy mummy is the most important thing and the affair, disruption and absolute lack of any commitment what so ever to work on the M is all that is being shown. I have taken many times to talk calmly to my boys telling them this is not what I wanted. This is not what I like to happen. They understand I think. She has said to me a few times they will be better off. This was a low blow intended to hurt me as I think she is jealous of the relationship I have with my boys so this gives me a barometer of my actions. my STBX is 'pretending' she is doing right by them. But sadly I had a W that was never ever wrong.
me45,W43 S9,S5 T15yrs M10yrs BD 4/07/15 W wants D 4/07/15 W filed 8/05/15 D petition arrived 21/12/15 Merry xmas, W,S5 S9 moved out 5/2/16
Many of us seem to be in a similar sitch with a few different elements whether an affair or not OR that you were the reason for all the things wrong in the relationship
I have my good days and bad and good weeks and bad since this started. I am pretty worn down and dont know how to get out of the rut. GAL'ing is fine but I still think about her and my D and the family being together constantly
We have a big talk tonight that I am kind of dreading but maybe something positive will come out of it. Who knows...
_________________________ Me-48 Spouse-WAW 52 Married for 10 years D7 ILYBNILWY 7/15 Suspect EA/PA 12/15 No confirmation/denial She files 1/2016 Working towards the Big D ...still in progress....
Before your talk review the 37rules about 10 times!
good idea.....especially keeping it cool
I have to ensure I don't go "there" Which is why are we dong this? Why don't we just separate and see how much we miss each other and want to be together again? We are making this so final with a divorce!!!"
Glad I got that out vs saying it.
_________________________ Me-48 Spouse-WAW 52 Married for 10 years D7 ILYBNILWY 7/15 Suspect EA/PA 12/15 No confirmation/denial She files 1/2016 Working towards the Big D ...still in progress....
