Thanks Sotto. I'll try to keep strong, your advice means a lot. It is good to have this forum to vent on.I've got a few work pressures, parents trying to plan family weddings in the summer, when to visit us etc and all I want to do is just live in the day to day. Also long term planning seems to be a recognition W won't be back, something I know in my heart to be true but it still hurts to face up to it. When she left she said she'd be whatever I wanted, when she sees me she still hugs me and gives me affectionate kisses on the lips so I think it is best to keep the NC going.
