Divorce Papers

[TimR]

Hello everyone. Just asking for some quick advise. WAW and I are separated. I have reason to guess she is having second thoughts. This weekend we were able to talk on the telephone a few times and today I took my sick step son to the dr without her prompting (btw I would have done that before separation).

So after a weekend where we seemed to make small but noticeable progress she calls me at work. Said she has been thinking about things and then started crying telling me all the controlling manipulative things I have done. After discovering her cheating on me I did take her engagement and wedding rings (yes my coach told me how stupidly I acted that night). She continued with telling me how spiteful and hurtful that was. I said I understand why she would feel like that. I also said listen we both are working right now and I do not want to ruin the rest of your day but I want to talk about this further (I had a client waiting for a meeting but did not tell her that as I think she would have viewed it as an excuse from me). I will call you tonight. I scheduled an appointment with a coach before we talk.

What I expect to hear about is everything I have done wrong (oh boy there is a lot). Mainly, I am guessing about the unilateral decisions I have made in the past, pouting, arguing and saying some mean things during those arguments, about me moving out (which I thought I was doing for her since she said she could not even handle seeing me and when I moved back in she screamed at me that night and screamed that morning again).

I have done so much damage to this relationship I do not want to do more so any suggestions or if anyone has experience with these "talks" I would greatly appreciate hearing from you. Please any advice or information would be great. I can see only 2 possible reasons for this talk. 1 she is having serious doubts about leaving and having a lot of internal conflict or 2 the realization of how expensive this will be for her and how her entire life style will have to change has her stressed. While I hope for the former, I think I made it perfectly clear that all she had to do was say the word and I would happily work on our marriage, so I think me hoping for the former is just wishful thinking. Thanks!