Mommy loves having her son there because he's doing everything for her from running errands to being there as a companion, i.e., keeping her company. She's certainly not worried about anyone but herself and her needs. Sounds a lot like a NPD personality.
As for your h, he's got a lot of issues to resolve. I can just imagine just how uncomfortable and strained it was. You really don't have a whole lot to talk about right now because both of you are living separate lives. Your son isn't happy w/his father and what has transpired over the years. It's unfortunate that your son feels the way he does and your h will have to figure out how to repair that bridge in the near future. It may be that it can't be repaired but let's hope it can to some extent.
I think you will enjoy working w/a personal trainer. You'll be sore for a while, but it will be worth the hard work.
Bottom line...take care of yourself and I know you are there for your children. Enjoy the time you spend w/them because they grow up so fast!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
