V, You are hurting and you are looking for a bandaid for a broken heart. Sure it would feel good to get some TLC, but in all honesty you are not ready, I know I still am not. Just stop looking over your shoulder for your wife and stop looking for a new R so soon, you really need to heal first and brother, you got some serious healing and rebuilding to do.
Would you say it is fair to the other person you hook up with that your W is still on your mind? Once you can honestly say you do not think of your W in a romantic way, then you are half way on your way to moving on, but only half way. Some literature suggests that a month of solo time for every year of a failed relationship is needed to fix yourself up (so for you that would mean 15 months), some experts say 3 months for every year, but IMO less than a year and you are looking for trouble...
