This sounds like a very challenging exchange, but I don't think is necessarily all bad. In fact I kinda think the opposite.
Reconciliation is still on the table, for both of you by the sounds of it.
It is also interesting to me to see that your communication styles are so similar and you are both bringing alot of anger to the table.
I think to you both share a similar naivety about the counselling and reconciliation process being about negotiation of terms and conditions. I think you find that is more likely a mediation process.
If you are both looking towards reconciliation, communication and learning to actually hear each other and connection is the starting place. And then figure out if moving forward is something you want. But that is just my knowledge and experience.
Look I think this is all up for grabs and the fact it's still on table is brilliant. One of you just now needs to man up for the sake of your marriage and kids and get the counselling happening.
If you can get some momentum happening out of this conversation that would be great.
I will be interested in Zues' comments. He has a much better handle on your sitch than I do. But those are my reflections Julie for what they are worth.
