Feyth, yes these interactions leave me confused and guessing. And IP, no my hopes at this point are not up. I'm just continuing to DB. I know these things:
a) His mom has Alzheimers and it is eating at him, although he pretends it isn't- he says there's nothing he can do about it (an uncontrollable issue that causes him pain). He was closest to his mom.
b)His dad's behavior is of concern as well, as he is stressed out being her caretaker, has dangerously high blood pressure, and is a "control freak".
c)He is stressed out about money. He did not really think about retirement and opened his own business only a few years ago. We carry a lot of debt.
d)He constantly complains about getting old and being old.
e)He basically puts a happy face on and works (has told his staff about filing for D but will try very hard to make his office a pleasant place to work),goes home and goes to sleep. On weekends he tries to ski or go to our vacation home.
f)He still gets family time with Bubbles' family as if he is their uncle. His attempts to do activities with our kids have not worked well, but they will stop by his office to say hi. Nether has visited his apartment even though he has invited them.
g)He stubbornly holds on to the fantasy that I don't like him. I will only show him understanding, friendship, caring, compassion, and eye contact and smiles (not as a Stepford wife). I will look amazing.
H is not happy. I guess I just keep DBing and trying to show him I'm a positive force to be around...even as we divorce and sell the family home. We have some work to do on it to get it ready to sell...I believe we will do that together as ski season winds down. I will try not to show negative emotions around him during the D process and while working on the house. I will try to be supportive as I know whatever is going on with him, he is hurting, too.
M-51 H-54 2D-27 and 25 M-26 yrs Bombshell and IHS 7-29-15 He moved out 10-3-15 D filed 1-27-16 D final 10-27-16
